Authors / Writers

Top 40 Dorothy Parker Quotes (CREATIVITY)

Top 10 Most Famous Dorothy Parker Quotes (BEST)

Of course I talk to myself. I like a good speaker, and I appreciate an intelligent audience.
Of course I talk to myself. I like a good speaker, and I appreciate an intelligent audience.
Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone.
Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone.
Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
Time may be a great healer, but it’s a lousy beautician.
If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.
If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.
The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity.
The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity.
The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.
The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.
If you don't have anything nice to say, come sit by me.
If you don’t have anything nice to say, come sit by me.
Heterosexuality is not normal, it's just common.
Heterosexuality is not normal, it’s just common.
Never throw mud you can miss the target, but your hands will remain dirty.
Never throw mud: you can miss the target, but your hands will remain dirty.
I like to have a martini. Two at the very most. After three I'm under the table. After four I'm under my host.
I like to have a martini. Two at the very most. After three I’m under the table. After four I’m under my host.

5 Dorothy Parker Quotes on Writing

“If you have any young friends who aspire to become writers, the second-greatest favor you can do them is to present them with copies of The Elements of Style. The first-greatest, of course, is to shoot them now, while they’re happy.”

Dorothy Parker
I hate writing, I love having written.
I hate writing, I love having written.
I'd like to have money. And I'd like to be a good writer. These two can come together, and I hope they will, but if that's too adorable, I'd rather have money.
I’d like to have money. And I’d like to be a good writer. These two can come together, and I hope they will, but if that’s too adorable, I’d rather have money.
The two most beautiful words in the English language are 'cheque enclosed'.
The two most beautiful words in the English language are ‘cheque enclosed’.
I'm not a writer with a drinking problem, I'm a drinker with a writing problem.
I’m not a writer with a drinking problem, I’m a drinker with a writing problem.

4 Dorothy Parker Quotes on Creativity

Creativity is a wild mind and a disciplined eye.
Creativity is a wild mind and a disciplined eye.
There's a hell of a distance between wise-cracking and wit. Wit has truth in it; wise-cracking is simply calisthenics with words.
There’s a hell of a distance between wise-cracking and wit. Wit has truth in it; wise-cracking is simply calisthenics with words.
You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think.
You can lead a horticulture, but you can’t make her think.
You can't teach an old dogma new tricks.
You can’t teach an old dogma new tricks.

2 Dorothy Parker Quotes on Wealth and Money

Money cannot buy health, but I'd settle for a diamond-studded wheelchair.
Money cannot buy health, but I’d settle for a diamond-studded wheelchair.
I don't know much about being a millionaire, but I'll bet I'd be darling at it.
I don’t know much about being a millionaire, but I’ll bet I’d be darling at it.

4 Dorothy Parker Quotes on Drinking

One more drink and I’ll be under the host.
One more drink and I’ll be under the host.
I’d rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.
I’d rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.
Vice is nice, but liquor is quicker.
Vice is nice, but liquor is quicker.
A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

8 Dorothy Parker Quotes About Life

This wasn't just plain terrible, this was fancy terrible. This was terrible with raisins in it.
This wasn’t just plain terrible, this was fancy terrible. This was terrible with raisins in it.
The only dependable law of life - everything is always worse than you thought it was going to be.
The only dependable law of life – everything is always worse than you thought it was going to be.
Don't look at me in that tone of voice.
Don’t look at me in that tone of voice.
That woman speaks eighteen languages, and can't say 'No' in any of them.
That woman speaks eighteen languages, and can’t say ‘No’ in any of them.
Tell him I was too fucking busy - or vice versa.
Tell him I was too fucking busy – or vice versa.
Honesty means nothing until you are tested under circumstances where you are sure you could get away with dishonesty.
Honesty means nothing until you are tested under circumstances where you are sure you could get away with dishonesty.
Years are only garments, and you either wear them with style all your life, or else you go dowdy to the grave.
Years are only garments, and you either wear them with style all your life, or else you go dowdy to the grave.
The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant, and let the air out of the tires.
The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant, and let the air out of the tires.

7 Dorothy Parker Quotes on Love and Relationship

I require three things in a man: he must be handsome, ruthless, and stupid.
I require three things in a man: he must be handsome, ruthless, and stupid.
It serves me right for putting all my eggs in one bastard.
It serves me right for putting all my eggs in one bastard.
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
Now I know the things I know, and I do the things I do; and if you do not like me so, to hell, my love, with you!
Now I know the things I know, and I do the things I do; and if you do not like me so, to hell, my love, with you!
She was pleased to have him come and never sorry to see him go.
She was pleased to have him come and never sorry to see him go.
Four be the things I'd have been better without love, curiosity, freckles and doubt.
Four be the things I’d have been better without: love, curiosity, freckles and doubt.
Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both.
Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both.

(MUST READ) Dorothy Parker: What Fresh Hell Is This?

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