PinGuys, I’m eating junk and watching rubbish! You better come out and stop me! – Kevin McCallisterPinDid I burn down the joint? I don’t think so. I was making ornaments out of fishhooks. – Kevin McCallisterPinThis house is so full of people, it makes me sick! When I grow up and get married, I’m living alone. – Kevin McCallisterPinAll kids, no parents. Probably a fancy orphanage. – HarryPinThis is ridiculous. Only a wimp would be hiding under a bed. And I can’t be a wimp. I’m the man of the house. – Kevin McCallisterPinKeep the change, ya filthy animal. – Gangster JohnnyPinI went shopping yesterday. I got you milk, eggs, and fabric softener. – Kevin McCallisterPinIf you need somebody to trust, it can be me. I won’t forget to remember you. – Kevin McCallisterPinBless this highly nutritious microwavable macaroni and cheese dinner and the people who sold it on sale. Amen. – Kevin McCallisterPinKevinnnnn! – Kate McCallister
Top 20 Most Memorable ‘Home Alone’ Quotes
PinFuller, go easy on the Pepsi. – Leslie McCallisterPinYou’re what the French call, ‘les incompétents’. – Linnie McCallisterPinKevin, you are such a disease. – Jeff McCallisterPinThere are 15 people in this house and you’re the only one who has to make trouble. – Kate McCallisterPinBuzz, I’m reading through all your private stuff, you better come out and pound me! – Kevin McCallisterPinHey, I’m gonna give you to the count of ten, to get your ugly, yella, no-good keister off my property, before I pump your guts full of lead! 1, 2, 10! – Gangster JohnnyPinThis is my house. I have to defend it. – Kevin McCallisterPinWhy the hell are you dressed like a chicken? – MarvPinMerry Christmas, little fella. We know that you’re in there, and that you’re all alone. – HarryPinYou guys give up? Or are you thirsty for more? – KevinPinOh, wouldn’t want to spoil your fun, Mr. Cheapskate! – Kevin McCallisterPinAmerican don’t fly to the promised land, little buddy. – MarvPinYou better not wreck my trip, you little sourpuss. Your dad is paying good money for it. – FrankPinYou ever heard of the south bend shovel slayer? – Buzz McCallisterPinIf it makes you feel any better, I forgot my reading glasses. – Uncle FrankPinWe slept in! – Kate and Peter McCallisterPinHave a great trip. Bring me back something French! – MitchPinI’m a criminal. – Kevin McCallisterPinKevin you’re such a disease. – JeffPinAll the great ones leave their mark. We’re the wet bandits! – Marv
7 Heart-Warming ‘Home Alone’ Quotes
“If you won’t use your heart, who cares if it gets broken? If you just keep it to yourself, maybe it’ll be like my rollerblades. When you do decide to try it, it won’t be any good. You should take a chance. Got nothing to lose.”
Kevin McCallister
PinI was afraid of getting my heart broken again. Sometimes you can trust a person, and then, when things are down, they forget about you. – Bird LadyPinYou can say hello when you see me. You don’t have to be afraid. – MarleyPinYou can be too old for a lot of things, but you’re never too old to be afraid. – MarleyPinYour heart might still be broken, but it isn’t gone. If it was gone, you wouldn’t be so nice. – Kevin McCallisterPinYou’re always welcome at church. – MarleyPinTurtle doves are a symbol of friendship and love. And as long as each of you has your turtle dove, you’ll be friends forever. – Mr. Duncan
7 ‘Home Alone’ Quotes About Family
“I’d probably be lying dead in a gutter somewhere. But not Kevin. Kevin is so much stronger and braver than I am. But he’s still a kid lost in a big city; he doesn’t deserve that. He should be at home with his family around his Christmas tree. Oh my God! I know where he is — I need to get to Rockefeller Center immediately.”
Kate McCallister
PinI made my family disappear. – Kevin McCallisterPinWill you please tell Santa that instead of presents this year, I just want my family back? – Kevin McCallister
“I don’t care if I have to get out on your runway and hitchhike! If it costs me everything I own, if I have to sell my soul to the devil himself, I am going to get home to my son.”
Kate McCallister
PinHow you feel about your family is a complicated thing. – Old Man Marley
“I know I don’t deserve a Christmas, even if I did do a good deed. I don’t want any presents. Instead, I want to take back every mean thing I ever said to my family. Even if they don’t take back the things they said to me. I don’t care. I love all of them… Including Buzz. I know it isn’t possible to see them all. Could I just see my mother? I’ll never want another thing as long as I live if I can just see my mother. I know I won’t see her tonight, but promise me I can see her again. Sometime. Any time. Even if it’s just once and only for a couple of minutes. I just need to tell her I’m sorry.”
Kevin McCallister
“Fine, I don’t wanna be down there, anyway. I can’t trust anybody in this family. And you know what? If I had my own money, I’d go on my own vacation. Alone. Without any of you guys. And I’d have the most fun in my whole life.”
Kevin McCallister
6 ‘Home Alone’ Quotes About Christmas
“No, no, no, no, no. It’s Christmastime. There’s always a lot of burglaries around the holidays. So we’re just in the neighborhood to see if everyone’s taking the proper precautions. That’s all.”
Harry
PinDamn. How can you give Kris Kringle a parking ticket on Christmas Eve? What’s next, rabies shots for the Easter Bunny? – Santa ClausPinMom, does Santa Claus have to go through customs? – Brooke McCallisterPinYou can mess with a lot of things. But you can’t mess with kids on Christmas. – Kevin McCallisterPinHow could you have Christmas without a Christmas tree, Mom? – Kevin McCallisterPinIt’s Christmas Eve. Good deeds count extra tonight. Think of an important thing you can do for others, and go do it. Just follow the star in your heart. – Bird Lady
16 ‘Home Alone’ Quotes by the Lead Protagonist, Kevin McCallister
“I’m traveling with my dad. He’s at a meeting. I hate meetings. Plus, I’m not allowed to go in. I can only sit in the lobby. That’s boring. So he dropped me off here. He gave me his credit card and told me to give this to whoever was welcoming people in so I won’t get into mischief. And ma’am, sometimes I do get into mischief. We all do!”
Kevin McCallister
PinBuzz, your girlfriend. Woof! – Kevin McCallisterPinA lovely cheese pizza. Just for me. – Kevin McCallisterPinThis is it. Don’t get scared now. – Kevin McCallister
“I had a nice pair of rollerblades. I was afraid to wreck them, so I kept them in a box. Do you know what happened? I outgrew them. I never wore them outside. Only in my room a few times.”
Kevin McCallister
PinWhy do I get treated like scum! – Kevin McCallisterPinDon’t you know a kid always wins against two idiots? – Kevin McCallisterPinI’m 10 years old. TV is my life. – Kevin McCallister
“At least you’ll know. Then you could stop worrying about it. Then you won’t have to be afraid anymore. I don’t care how mad I was, I would talk to my dad. Especially around the holidays.”
Kevin McCallister
PinIt’s a nice night for a neck injury. – Kevin McCallisterPinI’m not apologizing to Buzz; I’d rather kiss a toilet seat! – Kevin McCallister
“Howdy, do. This is Peter McCallister, the father. I’d like a hotel room please, with an extra large bed, a TV, and one of those little refrigerators you have to open with a key. Credit card? You got it.”
Kevin McCallister
PinExcuse me, but this is an emergency. What city is it out there? – Kevin McCallisterPinNo offense, aren’t you too old to be afraid? – Kevin McCallisterPinI hope I never see any of you jerks again! – Kevin McCallisterPinMy family’s in Florida… I’m in… New York? – Kevin McCallister
4 ‘Home Alone’ Quotes by Buzz McCallister
“A, I’m not that lucky. Two, we use smoke detectors and D, we live on the most boring street in the whole United States of America, where nothing even remotely dangerous will happen. Period.”
Buzz McCallister
PinBeat that you little trout sniffer. – Buzz McCallisterPinKevin! What did you do to my room? – Buzz McCallisterPinHe went shopping? He doesn’t know how to tie his shoe and he’s going shopping! – Buzz McCallister
10 ‘Home Alone’ Quotes by Harry
PinCrowbars up. – HarryPinWhere are you, you little creep? – HarryPinI don’t get it. I mean, right now it looks like there’s nobody home. Last night the place was jumping. Something ain’t right. – HarryPinWhat’s so funny? What are you laughing at? You did it again, didn’t you? You left the water running. What’s wrong with you? Why do you do that? I told you not to do it. – HarryPinThat’s the one, Marv, that’s the silver tuna. – HarryPinVery gee, huh? It’s loaded. It’s got lots of top-flight goods. Stereos, VCRs. – HarryPinHere we are, Marv. New York City, the Land of Opportunity. Smell that? – HarryPinYou better say every prayer you ever heard, kid. – HarryPinShut up, Marv! You got the right to remain silent, you know. – HarryPinMay I do the thinking, please? – Harry
4 ‘Home Alone’ Quotes by Marv
PinHe’s a kid. Kids are stupid. I know I was. – MarvPinYou may have won the battle, little dude, but you lost the war. – MarvPinI’m gonna kill that kid! – MarvPinI hope your parents got you a tombstone for Christmas. – Marv
2 ‘Home Alone’ Quotes by Bird Lady
PinThe man I loved fell out of love with me. That broke my heart. When the chance to be loved came along again, I ran away from it. I stopped trusting people. – Bird LadyPinDon’t make promises you can’t keep. – Bird Lady
12 ‘Home Alone’ Quotes That Will Make You Laugh (FUNNY)
“I took a shower washing every body part with actual soap, including all my major crevices…including in between my toes and in my belly button, which I never did before but sort of enjoyed.”
Kevin McCallister
PinLook what you did you little jerk. – Uncle FrankPinDon’t you know how to knock, phlegm-wad? – Buzz McCallisterPinI wouldn’t let you sleep in my room if you were growing on my a**! – Buzz
“My tie is in the bathroom and I can’t go in because Uncle Frank is taking a shower. He says that if I walked in there and saw him naked, I’d grow up never feeling like a real man.”
Kevin McCallister
PinSay… is it true French babes don’t shave their pits? – BuzzPinHas this toothbrush been approved by the American Dental Association? – Kevin McCallisterPinDown here, you big horse’s a**. Come and get me before I call the police. – Kevin McCallisterPinI don’t want to sleep on the hide-a-bed with Fuller. If he has something to drink, he’ll wet the bed. – Kevin McCallisterPinGet outta here you nosy little pervert, or I’m gonna slap you silly! – Uncle FrankPinYou can get beat up for wearing something like that. Yeah, I had a friend who got nailed because there was a rumor he wore dinosaur pajamas. – Kevin McCallisterPinWhat am I supposed to do, shake his hand and say “Congratulations, you’re an idiot?”. – Megan McCallister
2 ‘Home Alone’ Quotes That Will Make You Think
PinWhat kind of hotel allows a child to check-in alone? – Kate McCallisterPinYou be positive. I’ll be realistic. – Uncle Frank
(MUST READ) Home Alone: The Classic Illustrated Storybook (Pop Classics)